You are inadvertently becoming like your parents. It is not a choice, it is just the way of nature. Slowly and steadily you are turning into one of them, your ways, your thinking, your approach towards things, towards situations, towards day to day mundane life is guarded and stamped by the way your parents did them.
It is not something that parents teach their kids, how to be like them – it is what kids pick up. It is what they see day in and day out, it is what kids learn – life as they are seeing it. Ways of life as they are watching their parents.
My mom never had time to do much outside work and house work – self neglect was unavoidable. She did not have time to cook elaborate dinners or lunches – we always had bare minimum food at home. I did not like that. I still remember those afternoon’s when it used to be Pappa and me having lunch – roti and one sabji. He would make peanut chutney to go with it, sometimes he would get fruits that we would eat in the afternoon. Food in general was not a big affair in our house and my mom was not big on entertaining people either.
I love the idea of a well set table with a small spread of dishes served well, aesthetically. However it never comes to me naturally. I see people doing these things so effortlessly, they would just make a dip but serve it so well that it will please any ones eye. I somehow cannot do it, all I know or have seen is how to make roti sabji and I am an expert at that, any thing else seems effort to me. The reason could be because I have never seen it.
Just the other day me and the husband was window shopping at Sur La Table and I told him, when will I be able to set a table nicely and actually present my food well – he said its not within me and will take huge effort to change that.
I honestly want to change this, one for me and two for my daughters. If I start small – may be they will appreciate these things in life. It is not about how to cook, it is about enjoying the effort, it is about eating healthy and it is about knowing and learning to enjoy fine things in life. These habits can be nurtured and cultivated if you have seen them and grown up with them.
I cannot become a stellar cook or a mom who can bake cookies in her dream in a day, but try I can and try I want to. As I said it will take effort and a lot of learning rather unlearning and determination, it is like going against my nature, but a small change that I will start will breed tomorrows future, through someone else’s eye.
One lunch at a time, one dinner at a time, One day at a time, . Change is coming!